Timo♥

I saw a cute guy was playing a bass guitar with his left-hand at church last Sunday. I was melting of him, of his smile, of his laugh, of how he played his guitar and how he made jokes with his friends. I was thinking that his face is so familiar, it's like someone who I adore, oh yeah, his face is like my favourite singer. I mean, it's totally! 99% like my favourite singer, but I remember that my favourite singer is a right-handed and the 'cute' guy is left-handed, so they're a different guy. I sat in a chair right infront of he played his bass. He wore a blue-white plaid pattern. He is so stupid, I mean he's like my first Prince Charming. What he did are so stupid things and always made me laugh and smile. But I wouldn't show it!

I was really into him, into his face, into his smile, into what he always did. "Samantha!", shouted my big brother. I glanced to the source of the voice. "Nothing!", teased my brother. I was grumble and turned around to the 'cute' guy, but I couldn't see him anymore. "Where is he?", I asked myself. "It's all because you, my brother!". "Are you searching for me?", someone talked to me and when I saw, it's him. Yeah him! The 'cute' guy. I was frozen. He smiled to me. I was more frozen, I need some fire to thaw me.


"Hi. Don't be like that! Come on! I'm Timo and you?", he introduced himselves to me and let me sit beside him. I was more and more frozen. I needed my big brother now, where is he? My face was so pale, I needed some oxygen. I know I was excessive, but it was true, you can feel it by yourself. "Oh! Hi! I'm Samantha!", I said after a few minutes to let the fire thaw me slowly. He smiled again and again. We talked much. We loved Physics and music. He sang a song for me with his guitar. Okay! He's so cute! When I wanted to walk away from him, wanted to grab some water, I was falling and ...

"Auucchhh!", shouted me, 'cause my little sister tread my foot because I was blank. I was realize that the 'cute' guy came and introduced to me were just my imagination, huh? I was limp.

"Timo!", shouted the keyboardist and the 'cute' guy that I adored, answer the keyboardist. So, it was true! His name is Timo! And he really smiled to me :) I smiled him back.

First Prince Charming

I don't believe with the word of luck. I don't believe with the novel story that everyone is so easy to get their "Prince Charming" just for the first sight. Actually, I really don't believe with "First Love at First Sight", I don't know why..

Kenapa di novel maupun film-film, sang penulis dengan gampang sekali menulis cerita yang seorang cewek dan seorang cowok dapat saling jatuh cinta hanya pada pandangan pertama? 


I really don't believe it! Okay! I mean, it doesn't work in my life. Every guy that I see, they are just "cool" -__- Talk about my first love, I didn't love him [I mean my first Prince Charming, for me] at the first sight. We introduced ourselves, we were being friend -- bestfriend and knew each other that we loved each other. Not like in the novels or movies. The first thing that I remember is the feeling of 'falling in love'. Ya know, it's like we can't sleep every night, there's just him on my mind, we can't forget him, what he does and what he talks. Four years I loved him for who he is. 


My bestfriend and I loved the same guy, yeah, it's him, but we never fight -- we didn't know why. My heart didn't hurt at that time. I tried to always love him as like his promise that he'll love me forever and always! I never loved the other guy. But... "Who's the guy and who's the girl?", I asked myself. "Why am I always text him first, why it's like I need him so much?". I was confused. I tried not to text him and slowly my love for him was dull. I hope everything was gonna be okay! I hope... 


He loved the other girl as the answer of my heart questions. He lied to me. He said that he wanted to love me forever and ever! But now? He lied to me for six months. Six months, I still loved him. I tore all of the letters from him. I deleted all of his messages and his number in my handphone. I threw all of the stuff from him into a shoes box and I think my dad was throwing it, really throwing it! Goodbye!

"He always in my heart forever! I said "Never Ever Be Replace" and I promised it! I'll never break the promise!" -- My Quotes :]

He said that he'll love me always and forever. He said that he will follow me wherever I go. But now, just "Yeah, I loved her" -- yeah, that sentence made my heart was so broken, made my day was so dark and made me was so ill and feel didn't have any hopes anymore. Because, he was my medicine for my heart, he was my sunshine in my day of his laugh and all of his stupid things that he always did. How he played his guitar and drum were my smile and it was the first thing that made me melting. He was always be there for me, whenever I needed him. First time, I got super headache, I couldn't sit and I just wanted to cry, and I just could search his name on my phonebook and text him that I needed him, and he supported me. 

I cried at the time he admitted. I locked my door and cried alone in my bedroom. No one knew, except me, God, my heart and him. "Don't cry!" I still remember, what he told to me by texting. "Hey! Cry or not, it can't return the situation as before, right?, I said to him. Simply he just said "Yes". Oh, I hate when he just said as simple as like that!! Yeah, the last time he texted to me, he said "What's about your birthday party?", but I couldn't reply his message, 'cause my handphone was low battery. I replied it the next day, but he didn't reply me messages anymore until now. He gave a last "Happy Bday" greeting to me when I was 13 years old.

But, now I told myself that I just want to focus on my school and my future. Let God set who's my Prince Charming for me in the future ;] I miss him. I miss when we were texting, I miss when he smiled to me, I miss when he tried to talk with me, I miss when he always wanted to help me but he was so shy. We never talked each other in four years, pathetic!